DG

It was blue. Then it became bluer. Now, is it bluest? Hmm, let me think.

I opened that door. It was my choice. No one forced me. But honestly, I didn’t intend to come in, I just wanted to see. But I guess, ‘inside’ was good enough to entice me. I went in. And again, it was my choice.

It was white. Then it turned yellow. Slowly, it turned pink. Then it turned red. I stopped.
Do I like red? Hmm, I guess not. Can I pull back ‘white’? Or if not, maybe ‘pink’? It’s fine with me. But wait, why it’s ‘Green’ who’s coming? Uh-oh, this might be a disaster. Red plays hot and cold with green. Sometimes Red loves Green, sometimes hate collides with it. Hmm. Panic rush.

But what now, Blue is coming. As I’ve thought so. Why can’t Red let go of Green? And why can’t Blue stay there outside? Will they always follow each other?

Oh well, I think that’s really their ‘destiny’. Anyway, they blend perfectly – Red plus a little bit of Green and a sprinkle of Blue.. Truly, the thrill goes on.

And if maybe, just maybe, I’ll get tired of them, I know I can always go to the back door and get out. But I guess that will be a little hard, Red has covered the exit. But I have this feeling that Blue will somehow help me find it. So for the moment, let me just enjoy the journey with Green.


[Diary excerpt from Gray]
DG


Masyadong malaki ang mundo. Minsan.

Masyadong maliit ang mundo. Minsan.

MINSAN, nalilito na ako kung anong totoo. Masyado nga bang malaki ang mundo at punong puno ng espasyo? O masyado nang napakaraming tao nakapaligid sa’yo kaya hindi mo na rin makita ang espasyong tinutukoy ko? O baka naman, nakalikha ka na ng ibang mundo kaya wala nang espasyo para sa ibang tao?

Ang hirap huminga, naninikip ang dibdib ko. Patuloy kong hinahanap ang hangin. Patuloy akong kumakapit sa hindi ko maaninag. Patuloy akong tumatakbo. At lalong naninikip ang dibdib ko.

Gusto ko ng espasyo.

Binuksan ko ang unang pinto, punong puno. Nakita ko ang pangalawa, wala ng lugar. May ikatlo, ika-apat, ika-lima hanggang ika-sampu, pero bigo akong makahanap ng espasyo. Wala nang lugar para sa’kin. Wala nang lugar para humimlay. Napakaraming lugar. Napakalaki nito. Pero bakit ka napupuno?

Gusto kitang masumpungan ngayon. Gusto ko ng katahimikan. Gusto ko ng kapayapaan. Kailangan kita ngayon..

ESPASYO.


DG


This is one of the rare moments that I just sit down, close my eyes, smile and say “Thank You dear Lord for this lovely day!”

This is just an ordinary day, nothing so special. Today is not my birthday, it’s not my parents’ wedding anniversary, not my brothers’ promotion’s blow-out-day, not my bestfriend’s engagement day.. It’s not. But today is another day, another chance to love God, another day to be in awe of His beautiful creation.

I woke up with a little bit anxiety because I forgot to call my mom yesterday; I was a little bit worried because I've learned some of my text messages were not received by my friends and I myself didn't receive some messages as well. And oh, not to mention that a friend fell asleep while we’re in the middle of text-conversation. And so I woke up with a bit mixed emotions.

Then I went out to see the beautiful morning. It’s not really a good weather, but it’s fine. It’s not so sunny, not so windy, not so cloudy.. it’s so-so. But it’s a good so-so for me. I wanted to stop for a moment just to feel the weather and if I can just hug it, I will. Crazy? Nah, just amazed :)

I thank God that today I can call my mom and tell her I love her no matter how far the distance. I thank God that today I can make it up with my friends, rejoice with their success and comfort them as they feel low. And I thank Him that in return, my friends can make it up with me (Remember that friendship is a ‘give-and-take’ relationship. Hehe) I thank God for all of them.

I love God and the people He put into my life. Those people He gave me to give extra thrill to my not-so-boring life. If they’re not in my circle, then it could be so different. God is indeed wise and full of sense of humor.

I love God and the people He put into my life. I will never get tired saying those words.
I love God. I love His people. I love this life. And I can’t just stop praising Him for this.
I may never say it enough, but today, I choose to shout it out.

THANK YOU BIG DADDY! I LOVE YOU!



DG

Hi! I know I kinda messed up and haven't talked to you for a while. But no matter how busy I may become, you know I'm just right here, right?

I thank God for friends like you - friends whom I can trust and run to whenever I need one. And for times like this that you need a friend to listen, I'll make sure I will be one of your options. I will make it up with you :)



Love,
Your Friend
DG



Distraction.

There’s this photo which annoys me. Really annoys me. Honest. I don’t know why. It’s petty I know, but I can’t help it. I hate it. Period.

The first time I saw it, I just shrugged. First thought: “It’s none of my business.” But hey, it’s really annoying! Argh. You can really feel how much I hate it right? And the way I say it’s annoying might annoy you too. But it’s just how I feel, awful. Distracted. Yes I am.

I even try to close my eyes whenever it pops up to my view. I try to ignore it as much as I can. But dude, it is wholly captured by my good peripheral vision. Yeah you might think I’m a crazy nut, mumbling about something… so petty. Oh yeah, I know I know.

But you know what? This petty thing teaches me to be patient at times. This petty-distracting-photo teaches me to smirk and say, “Smile! It’s just a photo.. chill..”

Oh good boy, I really hate the feeling. I really hate being distracted by petty things. I always whisper, “You’re not created to get mad and crazy over silly (to the maximum level) things. You’re bigger than that. And not to mention, you’re more beautiful than that..” Haha! Oh yeah I know, I’m such a stupid crazy little frog. Forgive me, I’m just releasing all the bad elements stuck in me. Really.

You, oh you photo, you’re such a big robber. You robbed me of precious moments. Instead of having good times, I’m having hard times persuading myself that you’re nonsense and that you don’t deserve any single second of my time. But here you are, even lingering on my fingertips and grabbing my energy just to write-off my insanity over you. And my plea: Get off me oh please.

Yeah you’re petty. You also know that, right? So can you stop stealing my time? Can you stop hurting my brain cells and aorta? I need them to function well. I need not to lose my sanity even for a second. So please get off my sight.

Got it? Farewell!


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DG


It will always be my joy to be with you, to share moments with you and roll on the floor laughing over silly stories we’ve got. You are indeed great friends to keep. Just walking and laughing with you can turn out into beautiful memories. And of course, tissues won’t be missed to dry tears whenever they fall. Haha!

No pretensions, no masks. Just plain you, just plain us. And I love it :)
Thank you my dear friends! I love you :)



Love,
Your Friend
DG

So many things are happening. So many things are running on my head. Sometimes, I feel like I’ve lost my sanity. And sometimes, I wanna ask that question again.. WHY?
Everything seems so easy and yet so difficult. I want to refocus God. I feel like I’ve lost it. I want realignment Lord. My path seems crooked. I want YOU everyday.

Lord, in this busy head and aching heart of mine, may You still be the one enthroned. I love you.

Love,
Your child